Singlehood and Relatability
Being single in the Bay Area can be tough for many reasons.
While the Bay Area offers a great deal of excitement, lots of activities, and diverse people from many different backgrounds, it is also youth focused, socially transient, and expensive. People come and go so quickly that it's often difficult to get to know people and build lasting relationships. It can feel like everyone is out having fun and you're missing out, or you're not making the kinds of connections you'd like to have. It can be hard maintaining relationships as your friends and colleagues get involved in relationships, get married, have children, or move away.
You may struggle at times with loneliness, social isolation, social anxiety, or a harsh inner critic that hinders you from achieving the life you'd like to have.
Social Anxiety and Social Skills
Lots of people share a similar story: feeling socially anxious and isolated even though they really want to connect with other people. Some have grown up with few friends and feel nervous and uncomfortable in social situations. Others work long hours in environments that aren't supportive to building friendships and community. It's hard to feel like you don't fit in even as an adult, and wishing there were someone who could help you figure it out. It can feel awkward and lonely.
Dating in a Complex World
The Bay Area also offers a wide variety of different lifestyles that can be overwhelming in a dating context: consensually non-monogamous relationships, kink and sex-positive communities, online and app dating, hookup culture, and LGBTQ+ issues are just a few of the variables highly concentrated in our unique part of the world. Each variable adds another level of complexity to navigating an already challenging dating landscape, and can bring up a wide variety of feelings including fear, insecurity, confusion, sadness, frustration, jealousy, and anger.
Singlehood in Therapy
Not every therapist is familiar with these facets of single life, and I believe that one of the most important aspects in therapy is for your therapist to deeply understand and empathize with you. I am well versed in the issues of singlehood, and can help you navigate and make sense of the confusing feelings and challenges you are facing. Together we can explore how your history and attachment style influence how you behave in social situations and relationships, and work on the awareness and skills that will help you grow towards the relationships, friendships, and community you want.
While the Bay Area offers a great deal of excitement, lots of activities, and diverse people from many different backgrounds, it is also youth focused, socially transient, and expensive. People come and go so quickly that it's often difficult to get to know people and build lasting relationships. It can feel like everyone is out having fun and you're missing out, or you're not making the kinds of connections you'd like to have. It can be hard maintaining relationships as your friends and colleagues get involved in relationships, get married, have children, or move away.
You may struggle at times with loneliness, social isolation, social anxiety, or a harsh inner critic that hinders you from achieving the life you'd like to have.
Social Anxiety and Social Skills
Lots of people share a similar story: feeling socially anxious and isolated even though they really want to connect with other people. Some have grown up with few friends and feel nervous and uncomfortable in social situations. Others work long hours in environments that aren't supportive to building friendships and community. It's hard to feel like you don't fit in even as an adult, and wishing there were someone who could help you figure it out. It can feel awkward and lonely.
Dating in a Complex World
The Bay Area also offers a wide variety of different lifestyles that can be overwhelming in a dating context: consensually non-monogamous relationships, kink and sex-positive communities, online and app dating, hookup culture, and LGBTQ+ issues are just a few of the variables highly concentrated in our unique part of the world. Each variable adds another level of complexity to navigating an already challenging dating landscape, and can bring up a wide variety of feelings including fear, insecurity, confusion, sadness, frustration, jealousy, and anger.
Singlehood in Therapy
Not every therapist is familiar with these facets of single life, and I believe that one of the most important aspects in therapy is for your therapist to deeply understand and empathize with you. I am well versed in the issues of singlehood, and can help you navigate and make sense of the confusing feelings and challenges you are facing. Together we can explore how your history and attachment style influence how you behave in social situations and relationships, and work on the awareness and skills that will help you grow towards the relationships, friendships, and community you want.